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Lone Buffalo Brings in Real Buffalo

August 14th, 2016
Lone Buffalo

OTTAWA, IL – A precarious situation unfolded last Saturday at the Lone Buffalo in Ottawa when a marketing stunt went completely awry.

The Lone Buffalo, a restaurant, brewery and bar combination was opened in downtown Ottawa earlier in the year to great excitement from local residents.

Despite the great success, The Lone Buffalo looked to be hungry for more press as of late. Enter the live buffalo.

Touted for months as an opportunity to “Pet a Live Buffalo”, The Lone Buffalo opened shop Saturday to a steady stream of people waiting to grab a beer and pet a buffalo. As the line proceeded the buffalo (who prefers to be called a bison) became agitated and broke loose from restraints. The buffalo proceeded to smash windows, spill beers and trampled a hipster.

In a press release The Lone Buffalo stated, “We feel for the people who lost a beer in this situation. It’s a tragedy when a beer gets spilt and we really regret this happening. We now realize buffalos should remain outside.

As for the status of the trampled hipster, nobody seemed to notice or care.

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