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Man writes sad news

Local Columnist Tries To Write Positive News, Pens “We’re All Gonna Die” Article

February 21st, 2017

CHICAGO, IL – What started out as an attempt to bring positive and encouraging news to the masses, ended up being a cataclysmic spiral of despair and sorrow, when a local columnist, Bob Evins, failed to find anything uplifting or praiseworthy to write about. “I tried my best, but my article was due and I […]

Zoomed In Wacky Portrait Photos Make Columnist More Relatable New Study Finds

January 28th, 2017

SMALL TOWN NEWSPAPERS – When it comes to opinion columnists, a new study has discovered that zoomed in portrait photographs help people more closely relate to the author than previously thought. The study out of Joliet Junior College found that the more zany or wacky the picture was the better. “Look confused, silly, happy, unsure […]

Kid with his dog

OPINION: My Dog Is Better Than Your Dog

September 3rd, 2016

My dog’s name is Roy. He is a Golden Retriever. When I throw a stick he runs and gets it. When I yell sit five times he sits. When he sees a cat he barks. Everyone that comes to my house likes to get licked by him. He likes his belly rubbed. He eats dog […]