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Buzzfeed & CNN Report Donald Trump Meets With Satan In Russia

January 11th, 2017

UNITED STATES – After a firestorm of accusations of fake news stories and Russian hijinx, Buzzfeed and CNN have reported that Donald Trump has officially met with Satan in Russia over the weekend. The report was unconfirmed.

“We were able to uncover that Satan vacations in Russia and that is where Donald Trump met him.” Stated Buzzfeed’s CEO Jonah Peretti.

“Sources tell us that Trump renewed his commitment to racism, sexism, homophobia and Rosie O’Donald trashing during the visit.” Peretti continued.

“We are indeed still waiting to confirm these reports, but we figured that we could report on them now and just wait out verifying anything.” Peretti concluded.

The Cob was able to confirm that Satan’s primary residence is in Chicago, but he has been on vacation for several weeks stating that Chicago has become too dangerous for him.

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