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Man complains about the cold

Illinoisans Practice Complaining About Winter Early this Year

July 1st, 2016

NORTHERN ILLINOIS – With summer heat and humidity strongly planted upon the midwest, many people are looking towards the relief of cooler days. Still others bored with complaining about the high temps have moved on to complaining about the winter to come.

“I know it is summer, but it is never too early to start complaining about the next season to come.” Bill Smith, a Rockford resident told The Cob.

He followed up, “It may sound premature, but when winter comes I want to have the perfect complaint for that first snowfall. It takes practice.”

Some have taken drastic steps, such as turning their air conditioners to extremely cold temperatures or putting ice packs on their necks to jump start the complaining process.

“I’ll invite a few friends over to my house, they’ll be complaining about the heat, I’ll already be complaining about the winter cold. They know I’m just on a different level.” Stated Bill.

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